Being the parents of a big family can be a lot of fun, but there is always trouble ahead somewhere and the bigger the family, the bigger the problem. You and your partner need to work together to govern and herd your extended family together and make things like family trips and meal times more manageable. Here are some of the big challenges big families face, and how to get through them in one piece.
Transportation Problems
Big families mean big vehicles. You need a seat for everyone and space for all their luggage. If you are transporting many children there will be lots of essentials and non-essentials that need to be packed. The demands of a large family demand you upscale your family vehicle. For the ultimate solution to road trips and holidays, you may need to start looking at minibuses. Make your life easier, keep everyone together in the same vehicle and give yourself plenty of room for bits, bobs, and family dogs.
Look for a purpose-built minibus for sale. You should always buy a vehicle like this from a specialist that has lots of experience with vehicles for large families. The Minibus Centre has minibuses for sale for families of every size. They produce 4000 vehicles a year from their huge factory, and can also perform bespoke conversions if you have any special requirements.
Family Bathrooms
The queue for the bathroom in the morning can cause problems. For big families, you need a big bathroom, and preferably more than one. If you have a big family and the space free in your home, you should consider adding an extra bathroom or extending and upgrading the one you have. Adding an extra toilet and sink could be enough to cut the queue down in the mornings.
Downstairs toilets and bathrooms are the perfect candidates for a little expansion that can make bath times quicker and easier on all the family. See if you can fit in a shower cubicle in the space. Having this option available can speed things up, and is a handy and valuable feature to add to your home. They do not cost a lot of money to do either. For just a few hundred pounds and the loss of a corner in your downstairs bathroom, you can half the queue for the shower in the morning.
Keeping Things Quiet
Noise can be a big problem for families that have lots of younger children in a similar age group. They seem to love pushing up the volume, egging each other on. Most of it is just them having fun but when an argument or disagreement breaks out things can escalate quickly, especially the noise levels. More kids do mean more fun, but it also means things get loud and managing the sound can be a full-time job.
Try having some quiet hours. You can set a schedule when the kids know they need to keep the noise down. This can be great if you have some work to do at home, or you have young children who have an early bedtime. Some families use a card system like a football game. If you have a child breaking the rules a little and being a bit noisy, you can show them a yellow card as a warning. If they push the rules too far again, it’s a red card and an early bedtime.
Coughs, Colds, And Illnesses
A simple, common cold can bring a family to its knees. These coughs and colds spread through the family quickly. It is a good idea always to keep a stock of pills and potions handy, because when the flu strikes it will move through all of you at speed. Make sure you have the adult and child-friendly versions of your favourite cough and cold treatments available, plus some of the traditional home remedies.
If you have some space in the freezer for a few litres of chicken soup, get it prepped and ready before the cough and cold season strikes. Time off work or off school can be a very disruptive part of an illness in the family. This can be an opportunity to rely on your older children again. If they are old enough to look after an unwell younger sibling, maybe it would be better for everyone if they missed a day of school to look after them while you go to work. This way no one loses a day of pay because one of the little ones has a sniffle.
All The Small Things
Big families come with lots of small challenges. One of the biggest of these challenges is remembering everything. If you are making a family road trip, you can struggle to remember all of your children’s bits and bobs like toys and books or travel blankets. In dire situations, you can even forget a child. It can be very difficult to keep track of everyone and their possessions and the whole family on a schedule.
Make lists, especially checklists. Your firstborn can be a lot of help too if they have gotten old enough. They can help rally the troops when it is time to make a move, and provide an extra brain to think ahead and keep track of things. This can help them earn some added privileges that a teenager or tween may want, like later bedtimes or some extra money in their pocket for the weekend. You need all the help you can get when corralling a group of kids together, do not be afraid to pay your way a little with the older children in your family.
Being Switzerland
When conflict happens, and it will, you need to try and remain neutral. Be the Switzerland of this world war, and stay on the sidelines. Do not judge or take a side, try to diffuse the conflicts and make peace. This can be difficult, especially if you have a couple of kids who know how to press each other’s buttons and get an argument going quickly. It can be tough not to take sides, but this does neither side any good in the long run. Both of the kids are in a little bit of trouble for letting things get this far.
Always keep your own temper too. The last thing any inter-child conflict needs is an adult stepping in with their own angry energy to up the ante. Keep calm, stay neutral, and do not take sides even if there is obviously a right side and a wrong side in the conflict. Your duty here is to diffuse the tension and bring tempers down to an acceptable level. You can go through the argument with both children later, and discuss the rights and wrongs of the conflict then.
Every family takes work to make it work, but a bigger family requires a little extra effort. Try your best to stay above the fray, and keep calm when the kids are bouncing off one another. The conflicts may be a little bigger in a big family, but so is the love. Remember some of these tips and techniques next time your big family has you on the ropes, and work with your partner and your older children to keep control and the peace.
