Parenting teenagers is such a privilege and I am fortunate enough to have also taught thousands of teenagers over the past 20 years. These days, I am still doing front-facing work with hundreds of teens every month and I know how to start and maintain a conversation with even the most reluctant teens!
I work 1:1 with teens and deliver a self-leadership course to many many more in schools across Gloucestershire.
When I talk to parents and carers of teens, many have the same concerns: they don’t know how to start deep and meaningful conversations. Many report that the conversations are often simple or one way. Therefore I have created a list of open-ended questions that you can use as a conversation starter with your teenage children.
30 Open-Ended Conversation Starters for Teens
Engaging with teenagers can be challenging, but open-ended questions can facilitate meaningful conversations. Here are 30 conversation starters to open up a conversation with a teenager.
- What’s something interesting you learned recently?
- How do you feel about the latest trend at school or online?
- What are some goals you have for this year?
- If you could change one thing about your daily routine, what would it be and why?
- What are your thoughts on the music you’re currently listening to?
- Who do you admire the most right now and why?
- What are some qualities you value in a friend?
- How do you like to spend your free time, and why do you enjoy those activities?
- What are you passionate about that you haven’t shared with many people?
- How do you handle stress or difficult situations at school?
- If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and what would you do there?
- What are some things you think adults don’t understand about being a teenager today?
- What’s a memorable moment you’ve had recently?
- How do you see yourself in five years? What do you think you’ll be doing?
- What’s your favourite way to relax and unwind after a busy day?
- What’s a book, movie, or TV show that has really impacted you, and why?
- If you could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, who would it be and what would you ask them?
- What do you think are the biggest challenges facing your generation?
- How do you feel about social media and its impact on your life?
- What hobbies or activities would you like to try that you haven’t yet?
- What’s a cause or issue that you feel strongly about?
- How do you define success for yourself?
- What’s a piece of advice you would give to your younger self?
- What kind of impact do you want to have on the world?
- What’s a favourite memory you have of our family?
- How do you handle disagreements or conflicts with friends?
- What are some things that make you feel proud of yourself?
- What’s a skill you’d like to develop or improve?
- How do you balance school, activities, and personal time?
- What’s something you think is important for people to understand about you?
These questions can help you understand your teenager better and create a more open and supportive dialogue.
Why Open Ended Questions?
It is important to use open ended questions because otherwise you are likely to get a one word answer that doesn’t build the communication that you are hoping for. Engaging in conversations that involve open-ended questions can improve teens’ ability to participate in meaningful dialogues. They learn to listen actively, respond thoughtfully, and engage in discussions that go beyond surface-level interactions.
Furthermore, when parents, teachers, or peers ask open-ended questions, it shows a genuine interest in the teen’s thoughts and feelings. This can strengthen the bond between the parent and the teen, fostering trust and open communication.
Give it a go today and let us know how it went in the comments.
