My timelines on school media have been awash with photos of proud parents comparing their child starting to school to leaving primary school. These tweens have grown in size and in personality and will now be starting the next stage of their education. I have done the transition from primary to secondary school twice as a parent and there are things that I have learnt along the way that will help you and your child also make this transition stress free.
When my eldest child made the transition from primary to secondary school I was apprehensive because I had chosen to send Chloe to a school further away and she did not have the security blanket of going with her primary school friends. I had thought long and hard about the decision, but we had decided that we were the parents and it was our decision rather than hers on which school she would attend. We totally made the right choice and thankfully it didn’t take her long to see that! Colette has some great tips on things to teach your child before they start secondary school.
How To Make the Transition from Primary to Secondary School Easy
- The journey to school: One of the biggest changes is usually the journey to school, they have probably walked or been dropped off at their primary school by parents. Now things often change and they start making their own way to secondary school. If it is in walking distance it is a good idea to do the walk a few times so that they can time it and then leave at the right time in the morning. If there are few going to the same secondary school then arrange a meeting point and encourage them to walk together to start with. This just helps calm the nerves and gives them people to arrive with. It is often the walking into the playground or dinner hall that is hard when you don’t have a friend with you. If they are getting a bus, make sure they know what side of the road the bus comes from and where to get off especially on the way home!
- The right bag and shoes: Many schools now have branded trousers, jumpers, and tops. In my opinion, this is good as they all look the same which cuts out on your child wearing the ‘wrong’ trousers, etc. A uniform standardizes the pupils which is no bad thing really. However, shoes and bags are a different thing and it is worth doing a bit of research, try to see what bags the other children are taking, I have always found boys opt for sports bags and especially rucksacks as they are easy to carry and are big enough for all the kit they need to carry around. A rucksack will have them all packed up with loads of room for all the important stuff. Pencil cases, stationery and all the little extras that they can’t live without. Again in my experience girls tend to opt for tote bags and more of a slouchy style, Very sells more than 1,800 famous brands, including River Island and Superdry so it is a good place to start looking. Where feet are concerned it is important to get supportive, hardwearing shoes, remember they will be wearing them 7 hours a day, five days a week and so look for shoes that are made to last.
- The transition from primary and secondary school can challenge the organisational skills of many 11 year olds. Whilst we want their independence to grow, it is important that we give them the time to do this. They are going through a huge change so helping them manage this is vital for parents and carers. You can help by having a copy of the timetable on the fridge or somewhere and help them pack their bags. Also ask about homework and supervise them doing it. The more you can guide them the better so that they don’t get overwhelmed by it all. Then as they get more settled you can start stepping back.
- Recognise that this is a time when friendships change and that can be hard too. Old friends may spread their wings and want to look for new friendships. My son found making friends hard, he knew who he wanted to be friends with and I literally coached him through the transition. If your child finds it hard, do speak to their tutor who can be proactive in seating plans and helping enable friendships. You can also encourage your tween to join clubs that will help them find like-minded people that will become their tribe. If they are leaving behind old primary school friends, help arrange playdates to maintain those relationships too. My son still goes to watch Cheltenham Town play every Saturday with his old friends who he is no longer at school with. Their friendship changed but is still as strong.
- Talk, talk talk and talk so more to your tweens. The transition from primary to secondary school is easy for some but not for others. Keep asking about their day and show an interest.
Hopefully, these tips will make the transition from primary to secondary school easy for all involved. It is a new chapter and another step on the road to independence and growing up.
