Being a teenager today is different from being a teenager twenty years ago. I didn’t always like being a teenager but when it got too much I would take to my bed like some heroine in a Bronte novel and shut out the world. It was quite easy to do. I would just lie in bed and go to sleep. No interruptions bar my best friends turning up in my room to wake me up or my parents to make me eat. I did this rather frequently.
Today’s teenage life can be just as emotional. Teenagers still have a roller coaster of emotions to deal with but it is not so easy to hibernate in your room and just switch off. I have written before that I honestly believe that the media demonise teens on a frequent basis and that most teens are just doing what we want them to do. They play sport, they study and they hang out with friends. Yet for today’s teens there is the whole new development of social media to manage. Something I didn’t have. I would have to ring friends on my parents phone if I wanted to ask anything.
Women in the World is a summit that brings together extraordinary female leaders and change-makers to help build better lives for women and girls and during this summit Generation Girl is being launched this exciting campaign is sponsored by The Dove self esteem project. As part of this launch Dove set me a number of challenges related to social media. They asked me to consider what it is like today to be a girl as they launched a #nolikesneeded hashtag. By using the #NoLikesNeeded hashtag, girls will be urged to reconsider our image-obsessed culture, their personal ‘branding’, and the changing perceptions of body image, identity and sense of self.
New Dove research shows how girls can often use social media for self-validation.
1. As girls get older, their desire for validation increases. An 18-23 year old girl will seek three times more ‘likes’ on social media than a 13-17 year old
2. Girls with low body confidence are two times more likely to feel bad about themselves if they don’t get ‘likes’ compared to girls with high body confidence.
3. On average, girls spend 12 minutes preparing for a photo they want to post
As part of my challenge I was asked post as frequently as girls do on instagram, facebook, twitter and snapchat. I let social media take over my day. I considered how many ‘likes’ I was getting. I was required to take a selfie, and did you know girls often spend 12 minutes getting the selfie shot ready? I can believe it after it took me about 12 shots before I was happy (ish) with this one showing off my new purchase. You may notice the positive message on our wall which encompasses how I want my children to think.
I spent the day constantly checking my facebook and social media channels much like my 15 year old, who admits to spending about 3/4 hours a day with her ipad. I asked her where she spends the most time and it is twitter, instagram and snapchat. She is a consumer more than a poster but it still invades her time.
It is pretty exhausting being a teenager, the pressures come from all directions and there is little downtime. But I want girls to know that feeling good comes from within. It is good to play sport, to laugh with friends and to be happy in your skin. Getting likes and approval on social media is asking for validation and we shouldn’t be relying on others for that validation. Actually if parents gave their teenagers that positive message maybe they won’t look for it on social media and let those insecurities fester. I want my girls to know they are valued for who they are, for what they bring and not just what they look like. I want all girls to take on the world with enthusiasm and positivity and not be bogged down with insecurities. Beauty comes from confidence not anxiety.
“I am a member of the Mumsnet Bloggers Network Research Panel, a group of parent bloggers who have volunteered to review products, services, events and brands for Mumsnet. I have not paid for the product or to attend an event. I have editorial control and retain full editorial integrity”.
Sharing is caring!




11 Responses
This is such changes a great campaign. Mine are still far too young to have any concept of social media, but it does scare me how to help them navigate this social media minefield which I only have experience with as an adult.
It’s crazy how “looks” and being perfect is so important to people in today’s society. it’s also really sad to hear the statistics. i’ve never really worn makeup or taken ages to get ready… I guess I wasn’t too worried as a teenager what others thought but then I never really had the pressure that I feel is prevalent today. I’m trying to teach my child from a young age that she is naturally beautiful as she is. A great campaign!
Angela
I would not wish to be back as a teenager. It’s a really difficult time. I can’t imagine growing up now in the social media world where everything really is about image. great campaign.
What a great post. I agree, it’s no easy feat being a teenager in the age of technology! So many mistakes are public and permanent. I thought that your comment about branding was interesting – it’s true that social media gives us all the chance to turn ourselves into a ‘brand’ but then there’s the pressure to keep it up!
I’m so glad that I’m not a teenage in this social media age. I couldn’t imagine posting photos of myself online when I was younger as I an not a confident person at all and would have hated the scrutiny that we seem to get now x
My three children are all aged five and under, but I really worry about the teenage years as they just have so many pressures that we simply didn’t. Goodness knows what things will be like in 10 years, when mine are entering their teens. It must be so hard to be growing up with social media so prevalent and constantly seeking validation from ‘likes’. Gosh, I did so many things as a teenager that I would hate to have a permanent reminder of on social media. This is such a good campaign to hopefully help spread positive messages. x
That’s really worrying that girls are using social media to validate themselves. It’s scary because social media can be cruel for teenagers. This is a really great campaign, I’m glad you’re bringing awareness to it! x
I was just like you when I was teenager! I loved books and that is what I would do. Take to my room with some great books and shut out the world. Todays teenagers can’t do that and it is so sad. There is no real escapism now and you are so right about girls using social media to validate themselves. It is quiet scary in fact.
Being a teenager ten years ago is different to now too. I strolled round in tracksuits and knot buns on my hair, girls these days are caked in makeup and flashing a lot of skin. Parents need to teach these kids less is more and image isn’t everything. . Brilliant campaign!
As a mum of three teens – a boy and two girls, I find social media a blessing and a curse. But, like it or not,it is a big part of teen life today. Kaz x
A thought provoking blog, I wrote something similar recently following some research about the impact of social media on kids. The last sentence sums it all up – but trying to convince our young girls that beauty is so much more than a pretty face is such a challenge today. It’s really worrying but a really important message to communicate!