As parents, we are trying to get used to the pressure of having our kids at home all the time. Weekends were a time that we expected the chaos, the cries, the laughter, but now for many of us it is 24/7 and it takes some getting used to! Many of us had a day job and saw our kids and teenagers in the morning and the evening, after work, we are used to them being at school from 9-3.30 even if we work from home. Then COVID-19 happened and we need to relearn how to be patient with kids. We started working remotely. Schools were closed. Our kids were grounded at home, movements restricted. The anxiety, the uncertainty, and the pressure started to mount. It has been tough (still is) trying to keep our calm and peace with our kids during this period and still maintain our sanity. If you live in New York and feel like medical marijuana could help you ease the anxiety you’re feeling, you can get a NY medical marijuana card online to help release the tension and stress brought on by the lockdown. Here’s how to become more patient with them during these trying times.
Create and stick to a routine
You should reassure your children that everything is going to be okay soon. Remember that they can read and see what is happening across the world online or on TV. They will ask all sorts of questions and because you do not have the answers, you need to find something that can distract them from what is happening. Create a routine and stick with it.
Give your kids some responsibilities and chores to do in the house. Make sure you schedule some time in that routine to have fun with your family. They will appreciate you trying to make everything seem okay despite the world being on lockdown. Kids love a structured environment. When they know what to expect during the day, the anxiety and pressure created by the pandemic will ease off.
Let them talk to their peers
Kids, especially teens, are the hardest hit during this lockdown. They cannot socialize with their friends anymore. Not physically anyway. You should allow them to talk to their friends. Let them know that they can call their friends during specific times and for a specific duration. It will make them feel better talking with their peers and sharing their frustrations and hopes. Monitor these interactions (especially online ones) to ensure that they do not get misinformed.
Talk about their pandemic and how they feel about it
Your kids may be more frustrated with the lockdown than you think. They can no longer attend schools, play, socialize, go to the movies or concerts as they used to. They miss the normalcy. They want to find a way to pent all the energy building up inside them, but they have no idea how to go about it. Have a sit-down with them and have a candid conversation about what is going on in their minds. By showing them empathy, you will create a better and more lasting bond with them. There is a lot of misinformation going on, especially online and your kids could be feeling anxious about something they heard. It is your role to give them the right kind of information so that you can put their minds at ease.
Maintain a calm demeanor
Kids learn a lot from observing. They can tell when we are feeling anxious, angry, or fearful. Although this pandemic has left everyone feeling anxious and uncertain about the future, it is your duty as a parent to make sure your kids do not have unnecessary anxiety over something beyond their control. This has to start with you. Be concerned about what is going on, but always keep a brave face so that you can offer them hope and assurance that everything will be okay somehow. You may not have the energy to deal with panicked children.
Do not worry if you do not know all the answers
It is okay not to have all the answers to the questions your child ask you about the pandemic. This would be a great time to bond with them by asking them what they think about what they ask you. If you do not know something, do not lie to them. Just tell them that you do not know but you will answer them as soon as you get the right answer. The kids also understand that this is not something anyone has witnessed before and they are likely to give you a break if you do not have the answers to their questions. If you know the answer, be honest and break everything down in a simple and easy to understand manner.
Try positive reinforcement
To manage possible stress while parenting during the coronavirus pandemic, you can try keeping everything positive in the house. Instead of yelling at them whenever they start getting on your nerves, try correcting their behavior positively. For instance, you can try saying something like ‘Please collect your toys’ instead of ‘You are making a mess with your toys!’. A calm and collected tone can go a long way in delivering the message without sending panic triggers. The NSPCC has some great leaflets and information on positive parenting.
Pile up on the love and support
Your kids may be just as scared as you are (maybe more). They need more love and support during this period. Do not shy from showing them affection whenever possible. Love them unconditionally and show them that you will always be there for them through good and bad times. Hugs and kisses will be appreciated.
Find fun things to do together
You will be spending a lot of time together, so you better find something fun to do. This is where brainstorming comes into play. Let the kids suggest ways to bring the fun into the homestead. You can schedule games to play in the house or the garden. If possible, let them join you in the kitchen to help with the preparation of meals. It will be a great bonding time and a little laughter is encouraged. As an example, Erin and I had a great time making hot chocolate bombs this week.
Take a walk together
Take a walk around the neighbourhood together with your kids. Nature and the outdoors are a good way to decompress and reduce stress levels. Make sure to observe all the COVID-19 guidelines to keep yourself and your children safe.
